Back-tracking: A Reflection From Malawi

I had tried to post this blog entry in Malawi but failed....so I'm posting it here and now as a sort of retrospective introspection. :)

I am in Malawi—have been here for 5 days—and am currently in the city of Lilongwe which is the capital of Malawi. I have done some driving around—2.5 hours to the east to the lake (to a place called Salima), and 1 hour to the south to a place called Dedza. Much has changed in the city to where I have some difficulty recognizing where I am. And on the roadside, I can see what conditions people live in. I was able to see some of the villages from the road—the water pumps, the roadside shacks, the make-shift storefronts, the goods all piled neatly for sale right on the side of the road, and the bus-stops bustling with activity. I also saw a lot of “telephone bureaus” and little red stands labeled “CelTel”—these are places you can purchase airtime for your cell phone. A sign of the times? Or a time of the signs? I am not sure which it is for right now. I am amazed that there are people who can purchase airtime for their cell-phones but do not have enough money to survive for the next couple of days. But maybe that’s something I need to ask someone here; how does that work?

I had a conversation with one of the young people here—a 26 year-old. He was working part-time at the hotel at the lake. It was an interesting conversation but sometimes I wonder how much of it is to the tune of foreigners and how much of it is really what they think. Not that I doubt his honesty but I’m wondering how automatized language is to people who have been used to a certain way of life. I had to dig a little before I actually got any answers to what his thoughts were on NGOs. Here's his picture:


I am overwhelmed at what I see here. I am overwhelmed at the number of NGOs and joint-projects, initiatives, and whatnots that seems to be everywhere in this tiny country. I ask myself what can possibly be done that has not been done in the last quarter of a century, and actually succeed in distributing a long-lasting better quality of life for people who are struggling to survive....In light of all that, I try not to complain that my malaria meds (or something else) seem to be giving me all sorts of side effects; I have been saddled with a rash on my neck for almost a week now, and it does not appear to want to go away. . . .

GCP Update: Back from Malawi and Adjusting

Thanks to all of you for your prayers and your financial support!! They got me through what was an eventful time in Africa. I'm sorry it has taken me a while to get this update out, but I wanted to get all the pictures uploaded to an album and such as well so I could provide a link to the pictures with the update. I'm adjusting slowly to my life back in the U.S., even though I've been back for almost 2 weeks now. It was weird as I felt like a stranger in my own home and kept going to my suitcase for things because I had no idea where to find what I needed otherwise! Talk about disoriented! :) I guess that's what living out of a suitcase for 6 weeks does to me. So I unpacked and put away my suitcase in more of a hurry than I usually do, but I'm still at a loss for where to find certain things. It still is somewhat strange to be back in my own quiet apartment, with no one around, no animals around, and the lights only going out because I turned it off.

So let me begin by giving you some details of what I did after I sent you my last update, especially concerning the high school I was at. And then I'll share with you some thoughts.First of all, tracking down a bulldozer for the soccer field just was not possible; I just made some phone calls and talked to some people but all in all I just gave the missionary the $500 we had raised through our Providing Change campaign as a start. And I also gave them some numbers I had tracked down. I think I would need more time in Malawi to actually help them with this project as there is so much going on already; the issue is just time, and of course, money.

Second, I had gone with 2 workshops in mind - both only to last about an hour each. So my plan was to do one workshop one afternoon when I got there and then the 2nd one on another afternoon some time after I had gotten to know the teachers a bit. Well, you can imagine my surprise when the principal made an announcement to the entire school that classes would get out at 3 (as opposed to 3:20) for the entire week so that the teachers can attend "seminars". But rather than tell the principal that wasn't what I intended, I decided that I would go with his plan. I had brought some supporting materials for my workshop so I could just stretch it out, I thought. I managed to do it, with some bits of panicking the night before, but all in all I was so encouraged by the teachers' enthusiasm and participation that I wish I could have been there longer and had more material for them. We also made out certificates for them at the end because the missionary said that they (the teachers) would really enjoy that. So I made them, and they did indeed enjoy them immensely - almost as much as the snacks I brought to each workshop.

I had another surprise for me. I was asked to do a sort of group counseling type talk with the students - all 250 or so of them..... So for a few days, we broke it up by gender and by grade, and I tried to talk to these students about some basics of social support and feelings and things like that, feeling like it was such a pointless activity. But nonetheless I did it. And it turned out not to be so bad after all. :)

Other than that, I did a lot of observations of what the cities were like since I had not been there in over 20 years, and tried to talk to people about their lives there and also what they thought of the NGOs and what the government was doing as well as what they saw as glaring needs that just weren't being addressed. Of course I made my own observations, filtering Malawi through adult eyes now, and reliving my childhood as well. It was bittersweet at times, but after a few days of frustration, I knew I was where I needed to be for those weeks. And it surely did my heart good to be back home for a while, even if home had become somewhat different over the years.

I would have never thought, however, that I could get so frustrated with the frequent blackouts, lack of internet, and sometimes lack of running water (as well as lack of running hot water, or having to wait a couple of hours for the water to heat). For a few days I felt like a prisoner as I wasn't even allowed to walk around too much; I was told it was not that safe. I began to get restless and frustrated. My malaria medicine was giving me rashes and making me nauseated. I was overwhelmed by what I saw. And when I finally felt like I could be somehow connected back to the rest of the world through internet, blackouts would cut it off or the excruciatingly slow internet service would make me growl; one day I literally was on the verge of tears - being so frustrated I wanted to scream. I remember going back to the missionary's house and just staring at her wondering how on earth she did it. As I thought to the week ahead I told God I wasn't sure I could do this, let alone figure out how to come back to Malawi to live for 6 months doing research!! But then a few days later I realized that that was my human self speaking - the part of me that had taken so many things for granted living here in the U.S. with all the conveniences and the technology, and the part of me that lived with so many distractions that I so easily forgot what it meant to truly rely on God. I was pointed in the direction of seeing beyond that, and what I saw beyond that turned everything around. I saw the people who lived there: the teachers I worked with, the students who attended the school, the young people I'd talk to, and I saw their rejoicing hearts. When the students would sing at chapel, it was so spine-tinglingly amazing. I imagine this is a taste of what it would be like to hear truly angelic and pure voices praising God all day and night. And I wondered why we who have so much could not express that type of joy and happiness when we sang our praise songs and hymns at church.... But more than that, I saw why I wanted to be there; it was not because there's so much that I can do but rather because there is so much that I can learn.

So even with my moments of frustration, leaving was one of the hardest things to do. I was reluctant to leave behind people who had endeared themselves to me during my stay, and some who had become like family. My adventures and funny escapades simply added to the richness of my experience back in my homeland. And I knew I wanted to come back, without question. I refused to say goodbye, but rather said, I'll see you again - God-willing. And of course we do plan to go back because Malawi is the location for our first community work.

So please be in prayer for us as we begin to look at how to expand our work there. We will continue to maintain our relationship with Kings Victory Academy; I think this was just the beginning of a long-term relationship with them. We are still continuing our "Providing Change" campaign, so please continue to collect your coins. There seems to have been a misunderstanding as to how much it will actually cost to make the field. And I believe the total figure will be elusive for now because of the elusiveness of a bulldozer for leveling the field. But I will keep you updated.

Here is the link to my pictures from Malawi:

GCP Malawi Slide Show

Feel free to make your comments on them. If you have questions feel free to ask me. I will update the blog with more specific info on Kings Victory Academy as well, so you can check that out at a later date. So I hope you're just as excited as I am to see what we can do next!

Malawi Updates (or lack thereof)

I must apologize to those who were expecting I'd put up regular entries here. I myself was expecting to do just that, but I overestimated the availability of internet in Malawi. It exists, but to a very limited capacity. Blogging would have taken me hours to do and given me less hair by the time I was done.....Yes, that's how excruciatingly slow it can be. So, in order to preserve my hair, I decided not to attempt the blog entries. Now that I am back, I will try to catch you up on everything that transpired during my trip. And of course, I will be posting a monthly update as well either later today or tomorrow. Thanks!